My First Month
Captured in February of 2019.
Reflecting on January 2019 brings me back to my initial steps into an alcohol-free month, an experience I've shared previously. The goal was clear-cut: to traverse the entire month without alcohol, except for a single exception—a work event. Despite my resolute intent, I found myself having a glass of red wine during a meet-up with a friend (prior to January 19 - the last time I consumed alcohol) who couldn't quite grasp my decision to limit myself to just one glass (can’t win ‘em all).
So, in my inaugural journey of an alcohol-free month back in January 2019, there were two instances where I ended up having a drink. Gratefully, those moments didn’t deter me from continuing. I've come to realize that in any transformational journey, unexpected blips may arise. However, it’s not these deviations that define our path, but rather how we respond and learn from them. They serve as pivotal moments of growth, offering insights into triggers, strengths, and areas for improvement. Embracing these nuances with an open heart and resilient mindset not only reinforces our commitment but also empowers us to navigate future challenges with greater wisdom and tenacity.
Those first thirty days of an alcohol-free life were anything but a smooth ride. Uncertainty clouded my mind with endless "what ifs" and the lingering question of how long I could sustain this change. Thankfully, my partner stood with me on this challenge; having someone to lean on during the mundane moments brought unexpected joys. Back then, the world of sobriety and living alcohol-free wasn't as prominent online as it is today. There were pockets of supportive spaces, but nothing close to the vibrant community that thrives now, which is an invaluable asset in the journey of sobriety.
Navigating this new chapter, I consciously avoided fixating on the daunting prospect of long-term sobriety. Instead, I embraced a day-by-day mindset, with One Day At A Time (ODAAT) as my guiding principle, which turned out to be remarkably effective - and a big reason why it’s shared so often.
During that first month and those that followed, a floodgate of emotions erupted within me, emotions I had long suppressed using alcohol as a shield. It had muffled my genuine emotions, masking them with the temporary relief of booze. Waves of mood swings, anxiety, and awkwardness often left me overwhelmed. I'd frequently ask myself, "What's wrong with me?" It was during these challenging moments that I began to truly understand the profound impact alcohol had on me.
As time progressed, I encountered a paradox within - I felt lighter yet heavy, energized and drained, happy and sad, even angry. Rather than resisting this rollercoaster of emotion, I embraced the ride, letting each feeling wash over me. Through persistence, I held firm to the belief that every step represented taking it one day at a time.
For those on their Dry January adventure, or striving for a sober lifestyle, remember this: experiencing emotions is a natural part of this journey, much like waves in the ocean - sometimes calm, other times turbulent. And, a small blip is not a defeat; it's a moment of growth. Keep forging ahead, for it's in these moments that we evolve. Persevere through challenges, embrace the unruly emotions, learn from setbacks, and continue to cultivate the resilient force that brought you here.
It's the courage to get up every day and continue that sets you up for transformation. Keep going, keep growing, and embrace each day as an opportunity for progress and self-discovery.
The true essence of freedom lies not in the absence of a drink but in the liberation to live authentically, embrace every moment (no matter how challenging they are), and savor the unfiltered beauty of life itself.
HM
If you’re looking for additional support, I have a few more spots open in my 1:1 90-day reset. Learn more here.
